What have you seen?

Wives, 

When you sit quietly wondering if God will ever change things in your marriage, take courage that I have seen Him do it! 

I am not the only one. 

If you have seen God do amazing things in your marriage, will you help me encourage a wife who needs it? 

Share your story of how God changed something in your marriage. What have you seen? Comment below!

 

Really?

It's the latest saying. We hear it all of the time and even find ourselves looking at people with that classic facial expression then… out it comes, “Really?”
Far too often, what we really mean is "Are you crazy? Could you possibly be that stupid or inconsiderate? You have got to be kidding me! 

In today’s popular culture, I like many have come to accept "Really" along with that accompanying face as more polite and easier to accept.

So wives, here are a few of my latest thoughts that come with…..Really?

• Do you really think the best time to cry out to God for change in your marriage is when things are bad?

• Have you really neglected to be intimate with your husband for months and act like you are doing him a favor by "giving him a bit of love?"

• Can you really look me or anyone else in the eye and complain about how tired you are, knowing that you have not done anything to change your schedule?

• Is it really possible that the person who needs to make changes in your marriage is you and not your husband?

I say, Really, Yes Really!

It is possible to have a strong growing marriage. The kind that you dreamed of and the one you committed to in the beginning. The problem is that many wives fail to make the needed investments of time, study, and prayer to keep love growing. Please don’t let that be you. If you find yourself facing the same complaints from your husband over and over again, it is time to access your marriage.  Take a quick look.

If your marriage is good,

Thank God. This is the time to plant seeds of trust, prayer, and Bible Study. Use my book Wife School, using God's Word to build a stronger marriage to guide you. So many wives are saying it is blessing them. It can bless you too. Get a copy and please bless me by writing a review. This is the time!  

If your marriage is marginal, (you can take it or leave it),

Thank God. You are still a wife. Now is the time to get “on purpose.” Join the Wives On Purpose Community and begin to connect with wives who are positive. Read, Wife School and actually complete the exercises. They are for you… not me. I have already done them and lived them. Make it a point to pray for your husband every day. Pray and listen to God for yourself.

If your marriage is troubled and your spirit along with it,

Praise God. He is still good and His love endures forever. This is the time to get professional help. For YOU!  Your husband may not want to work on the marriage. He may be just as sick of you, as you are of him. Remember, God can work through you to fix the relationship however, you must commit to the work. 

During troubled times, you may need support . You don't want to grow weary in well doing. I suggest you refrain from calling friends to complain or vent. I also strongly discourage using this season to talk about your husband on Face book. Turn inward and deal with your own stuff. This is an urgent time to learn to be a more suitable helper. .

So if you think what I am saying is mean, I say to you “Really?” (Insert facial expression here)  

Those who know me will testify. My heart desires the best for your marriage. I am for your success! I am the one who says, "Marriage is hard work especially if you wait until the last minute to study for every test." 

My assignment from God is to help you enjoy the good times and study and prepare for the rough times. I do this through: 

• writing
• blogging
• speaking 
• coaching

Please understand that I can’t take your tests for you nor will I be the one to grade your work. Your husband, your marriage, and your life’s fruit will be the marks on your final paper. I can only promise that God’s Word (the Bible) says that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

Are you seeking Him…Really? (No facial expression needed)

Peace and blessings be yours,

Lisa   

Pray For My Husband

Wife: I have a prayer request

Lisa: Yes, what is it?

Wife: Will you pray for my husband? 

Lisa: Sure

This exchange has been a part of my casual conversations since 2005. As I talk with wives in all seasons of marriage, eventually they ask me to pray for their husbands. I have never denied anyone prayer. That is why for 5 years I hosted the free conference call to pray on Monday nights. Many of you were there. 

In 2013, God lead me to stop the call so I could teach wives to pray for their own husbands. 

You see, I believe that marriage is personal and precious. Most prayer requests for it should be reserved for only closest and most reliable friends. (Only those in my inner circle are ever asked to pray for my husband). Setting such boundaries to protect your marriage is one of the principles I teach in my book, Wife School, Using god's Word to build a stronger marriage. I hope you will adopt this boundary for your marriage. 

Why is this important? 

I believe that some prayers for husbands God will only answer if they come from his wife! That is you. How cool is this? I think God has a fondness for the covenant He established and desires to use it to bring wives closer to Himself. Husbands are a wonderful reason to pray. 

As many of you know, I am a huge fan of Stormie O'Martian's book, the Power of the Praying Wife. I will begin praying through it with my Summer Intensive group and wanted to offer you the chance to join me. 

For the next month I will periodically post some thoughts about the prayers. I will ask for your comments and impressions. Mostly I am looking for how God has changed you and your marriage as you pray His word over it. I get excited about testimonies so we will share them here on the blog. 

Are you ready? Do you have a book? 
Get a copy and begin to pray. I will meet you back here to check on you. 

By the way, when wives ask me to pray for their husbands these days. I recommend Stormie's book. At least until my book of prayers gets published. 

Sending hugs you way. 
Lisa
 

Pick It Up

Then He said to them all, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it. 

(Luke 9:23-24 NKJV)

What is the thing that you must take up daily in order to follow Jesus?

I have come to realize that in marriage “the thing” can easily be the negative feelings I have towards my husband. They creep in at various times. Disappointment, anger (I know you don’t get mad your husbands, but there are times when I am angry with mine) even hurt feelings must be considered my cross and be taken up.  

In the times when Jesus walked the earth as man, the cross was the very thing used to kill. Death on the cross was a slow death.  It sucked the air out you and you suffocated. Isn’t that what these kinds of feelings do to a marriage?  Since Jesus was made to carry His cross, I find it only makes sense that He should instruct us to carry ours. What is the thing that you must take up daily in order to follow Jesus? 

Luke 9:23 says to us all, if we desire to come after Him we must deny ourselves. Those feelings I mentioned earlier…. I must deny myself. I must find a way to deny my feelings the right to take over. Hurt, anger and disappointment will kill my marriage slowly if I allow myself to be hung up on them. The key is to carry them like a cross behind Jesus. 

How often does this happen? My guess is daily! Jesus knows that we experience crosses in our marriage every day so that is how frequently we must take them up and follow Him. What does that look like for me?  

Here are a few of my tips:

· Acknowledge your cross? What is killing your joy, peace, or love?  

·         Deny yourself the ease of keeping that cross around.  

·         Deny its control over your thoughts and feelings by taking it up in prayer.

I commit to following Jesus although experiences and feelings may threaten to kill my love for Him and my precious husband. I do this daily and you must too!

What is your cross made of? Are you prepared to take it up and to follow Jesus? If you desire to come after Jesus, join me in this cross carrying thing. It is not easy but Luke 9:24 promises that if we desire to save our lives then we must lose this flesh stuff.   

You can do it, pick up some cross and carry it to Jesus. You will see Him save something in your heart, mind, and marriage. If you do this every day, your love will grow and your life will be saved!      

Comment below and tell us what crosses do you pick up each day? 

Are you carrying the things killing you marriage to Jesus?